Holiday traditions can bring joy and connect us with loved ones. But when a cancer diagnosis threatens to upend those beloved traditions, you can help reclaim control of the holidays through careful planning, grace and the help of friends, family, and your medical care team.
“The holidays can bring up feelings of fear or frustration for people undergoing cancer treatment. Those who are immune-compromised wonder if it’s safe to gather, while others may not have the physical or emotional energy to celebrate the way they are accustomed to,” says Kristyn Fazzalaro, MSW, LCSW, APHSW-C, Director Palliative Care & Oncology Support Services, Hoag Family Cancer Institute.
By talking through concerns, setting reasonable expectations, and prioritizing wellness, people with cancer can successfully navigate – and enjoy – the holiday season.
Fazzalaro advises patients to gather. Cancer-related fatigue can cause people to prioritize sleep over social activity. While rest and pacing yourself is important, maintaining connections to those who care about you is often an overlooked component of healthy living. In fact, some studies associate strong social support with improved cancer survivorship.
“While this may not be the year to brave a crowded mall during cold and flu season, seeing family and friends is still an important part of the way we take care of ourselves during the holidays and all year long,” Fazzalaro says. “Prioritize ways to get together safely with those you love.”
This may mean masking, virtual gatherings or smaller get-togethers, Fazzalaro says.
Another tip: Indulge wisely, enjoy fully. Maintaining a healthy diet and exercise routine can be challenging for anyone during the holidays, and it can be especially difficult when you’re facing cancer treatment. Fazzalaro recommends talking with experts including specialized oncology dieticians and physical therapists, who can offer personalized, healthy, and safe approaches to navigating the holidays.
“Staying active can lead to decreased fatigue, improved blood sugar regulation, enhanced sleep patterns, and overall wellbeing,” Kristyn Fazzalaro says. “And remember to eat well. Hoag Family Cancer Institute’s comprehensive nutrition services help those undergoing cancer treatment experience fewer side effects and reduce the risk of hospital readmission.”
Holiday meals can be tricky for people undergoing cancer treatment. Hunger cues change, as do immune responses, tastes, and nutritional needs.
Honor your energy, says Fazzalaro. It is possible to be in a room full of people and still feel quite alone in your experience. Practicing mindfulness, using simple breathing exercises, and talking through your feelings with loved ones or a professional therapist before a family gathering or holiday event can help you stay present in the moment.
“Communicating ahead of time can help prevent you from answering the same question multiple times during a party,” Fazzalaro says. “For example, consider sending an email to your relatives and loved ones to share a bit about your diagnosis and treatment before seeing them.”
This may also be the time of year you say “yes” to accepting help and “no” to things that will emotionally or physically drain you. If hosting your whole family for a holiday meal is too taxing this year, try turning your event into a potluck, ask for help with decorating and cleanup, or suggest someone else take over hosting responsibilities this year.
Holiday traditions are grounding and important, but they are not inflexible. They are meant to bring you and your loved ones together in meaningful ways. By listening to your body, maintaining your social connections, and communicating your needs, fears, and joys, cancer can inform—not define—your holiday season.
