Quick Glueck Shtick

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 * Are Dogs People Too?

People love their dogs. In fact some of them have greater love for their dogs than their spouses, relatives and friends. So why is it that we don’t protect our dogs from injury when they are riding along in our cars or trucks? They have little or none of the protective safety gear we gladly give ourselves. Dogs run around inside the car, stick their heads out the window and do all sorts of amusing antics. In some cases they contribute to an accident by distracting the driver. So why doesn’t someone invent a safe and sturdy doggy car seat that works for all sized dogs? Yes, the design would have to be more ingenious and clever than the usual ineffective attempts at dog seats we have now. But certainly a good mechanical engineer or other skillful and creative person could design a safe doggy seat. Take good care of your dog. Remember, they are man and woman’s best friends and they are almost human.

* Indestructible

Some of our youth in Newport Beach attend private schools that require them to wear a uniform. Moms have probably noticed that the uniform material lasts forever. Kids play and rough house in them and wear them all day. Moms like them because they are easy to wash, don’t require ironing, and you don’t have to play “keeping up with the Jones’s.” The material is practically indestructible no matter how many times mom washes them. All of which brings up the question: Why don’t they use this material for adult clothing? Could it be that the guys would get tired of wearing blue and red plaid pants and suits?

 * Stupid Decision

The number of paroled sex offenders who are on the loose in California has increased 15 percent since the Governor’s sweeping law enforcement realignment law took place 17 months ago. A bleeding heart federal court decided the jails were too crowded after some of these offenders — who had repeat crimes while paroled — were returned to jail. Using all their legal wisdom, the judges ordered them released. Our judiciary seems more worried about the crowding of criminals than protecting your safety and that of your family. How about a simple solution? When one of those released sex offenders commits another crime how about the judge who ordered them released being held responsible and liable All of a sudden they wouldn’t be so anxious to let these predators loose on the rest of us.

 * Stupider Decision

Didn’t we used to live under the impression that one of the duties of the government was to protect the people? At least that’s what the First Amendment says. In the past few years so many decisions seem to be just the opposite of common sense that it makes you wonder just whose side they are on. On March 7, the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) announced that starting April 25, small penknives, souvenir bats and two golf clubs would again be allowed on planes. Why go backward just because certain items are hard for the inspectors to find? In 30 seconds, trained terrorists could easily take control of a plane with these potentially lethal weapons. Why is it when we learn to take one step forward we undo it with two steps backward?

 * It Wasn’t Me

My son, Jeff, came home from work at 7:00 pm and found all three kids in bed but not yet asleep. His wife told him that the two-year-old boy-girl twins were in their cribs and weren’t getting a bedtime story. They were paying the “consequences” for not behaving well and not listening to their mother. When Annika saw her father enter the bedroom she threw her arms into the air, looked at my son with her big baby blues and proclaimed, “But daddy, I am cooperating.”

Michael Arnold Glueck M.D., Newport Beach, is an ornery curmudgeon who can be found at [email protected].

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