Quick Glueck Shtick Leftovers

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* A Prophetic Fortune Cookie?

At our usual Wednesday family sojourn to Al Palace for Chinese food, I found a pleasant greeting in the fortune cookie. It read, “You have a charming way with words when you write.” Pretty amazing when you consider that the baker who put those nice words in my cookie hardly knows me. But then again, since the compliments come few and far between at this stage of my life, I’m glad to hear such kind words from a fortune cookie. The words that follow are hardly charming but hopefully will give you a few laughs. Art Linkletter was right when he said that “People are Funny” and “Kids Say the Darndest Things.”

 * A Royal Slice of Bread

Since the anecdote about four year-old Granddaughter Brooke got bumped for space in the NBI last time, the paper is giving her second billing this week. Brooke was at a bookstore with her mother. She had seen the book titled, “Monsters Eat Whining Children,” earlier in the week at a friend’s house and asked her mother to buy it for her. After reading the book at home mom said to Brooke, “See, if you don’t behave, the monsters will put you in a sandwich with cucumbers”. Without missing a beat, Brooke replied, “You better get some really big slices of bread.”

 * Magically Right Before Your Eyes

Recently two friends were driving in Anaheim. They stopped at a red light. They noted a service station on the corner to their right. Gas was selling for $4.13 per gallon. When the light turned green they again glanced over at the station and noted that the price of gas had suddenly jumped to $4.17 a gallon. Why is it that the price of gas goes up so much faster than it goes down? Increasing at the rate of four cents a minute per gallon, how long will it be before prices reach $100.00 per gallon?

 * The Wild West

If you follow the headlines, you are aware that shooting at innocent people (for target practice) has become a wide-spread sport. Do you think that people have decided to start shooting now before Obama takes away some of their bullets and guns?

 * The Wild Strip

People from Newport Beach love to visit Los Vegas for a quick get-away holiday. On Thursday, Feb.21, the Las Vegas Strip became a scene of deadly violence, when someone in a black Range Rover opened fire on a Maserati at a stoplight. The Maserati was sent crashing into a taxi that burst into flames, leaving at least six people injured and three dead. The car-to-car attack occurred at Las Vegas and Flamingo boulevards that is the site of several major casinos, including Bellagio, Caesars Palace and Bally’s. In the future will Los Vegas still be able to advertise itself as a family friendly (with kids) destination?

* He Didn’t Miss the Bus

He is missed not only by the entire Laker organization and their fans but far, far beyond. Jerry Buss’s death is a blow to all sports, their teams, management and fans. We were blessed in Orange and LA counties to have him around for roughly 35 years so that he could teach us the right way to do things. In the past few years we have lost, through death or retirement, Jerry Buss (owner), Chick Hearn (the voice of the Lakers), and Phil Jackson (best basketball coach ever). Currently the Lakers have Pau Gasol who is out indefinitely with a plantar fascia tear, and Dwight Howard who plays like he doesn’t want to play. Who are these Lakers now? It looks like the Lakers need to hire a top Madison Avenue PR firm to give them a new branding.

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